Friday, 30 December 2011

You might be a "crunchy mom" if...

Starting over again as a mom has been very eye-opening.  The mom wars are out of control with grown women acting more like elementary school bullies than mature adults.  Maybe it was always there and I was sort of immune to it the first time around because I had no other mom friends.  Regardless, it's BAD.  Work, or stay home, crunchy or silky, you just can't win.  Honestly, I don't think anyone is purely one thing or the other.  I obviously fall full on the crunchy side of the fence, but I'm not perfect.  We own a 4-wheel-drive truck, and another SUV, and frankly, have no plans to drive anything smaller.  I have three children, and not one of them have been born via a drug-free labour (although I do plan to change that the next time around)  We are super-geeks and own a redonklus number of computers and video-gaming systems.  And just last night, three out of five of us took *gasp* over the counter medications before going to bed!  (For the record, that is not a normal day)  For sure, though, from a mainstream point of view, we're pretty out there.  Periodically, I stumble upon a "You Might be Crunchy if" post and they make me giggle.  The last one I read seemed a little judgy mcjudgerson to me, so I want to say here and now that I don't really care HOW you raise your kids as long as you're meeting their basic needs, and giving them lots of love.  I am well aware of the fact that my friends run the gamut in everything from religion to politics and, yes, parenting styles.  That's the way I like it.  So without further adieu, and in no particular order...
You might be a crunchy parent if...

You own "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" and religiously chart your cycles because those birth control hormones are kinda unnatural.

You jump for glee when anything by Ina May Gaskin shows up on the shelf of your local Half Price Books, and would really flip if you could meet her to get one of them signed.

You own more than 5 vegetarian cookbooks.

You secretly think that packing your bags and taking a month-long getaway to The Farm would be a refreshing break.

Your toddler got a big, fat stack of books, woolies, cloth diapers and Duplos for Christmas, but not one single toy with batteries.

You know all about the healing benefits of amber and have an amber teething necklace for the baby.  Bonus points if you also one one for yourself and older children.  ;)

Before taking any medication for sore shoulders or a stuffy nose, you bust out the aromatherapy pillows.

Your favourite form of relaxation is yoga or meditation, and you have already introduced your toddler to Itsy Bitsy Yoga.

You make your own laundry detergent.

You use wool dryer balls instead of fabric softener or dryer sheets.

You delight in shopping locally and from small businesses, and wish you never had to buy anything from a national retailer.

You're more than happy to buy most anything used or from a thrift store because reducing, reusing and recycling is cool!

You've done an entire blog post extolling the virtues of coconut oil!

You make your own deodorant.

You no 'poo!

On the rare occasion that you do purchase body products from the store, you read the back of the label looking for parabens and other yucky things that you can't pronounce.

You have a stash of essential oils and know various applications for the use of them.

You put your knowledge of essential oils and love of natural remedies to good use making your own body products.

Your household cleaning products consist of baking soda, white vinegar and tea tree oil.

When you're sore at the end of the day, you're far more likely to reach for a glass of wine than a pill bottle.

You don't actually own any paper towels or napkins, but use the heck out of some microfibre towels.

You use cloth diapers and wipes.  Bonus points if you use cloth wipes for any other family members.  ;)

The ladies in the household use a Diva Cup, Sea Pearls or Mama Cloth.

You have ever breastfed a baby beyond 12 months.

Your answer for everything from pink eye to stuffy nose is to squirt breast milk in it!

You save your veggie peels to make vegetable stock and compost everything else.

You own more than two babywearing devices (but not a Bjorn or Infantino, eww!), love each of them for different reasons, and have your eye on just a few more.

You co-sleep, and couldn't imagine having your baby in a different room from you.

You have ever had, or plan to have a home or birth centre birth.

You have researched and plan to consume your own placenta via encapsulation or otherwise.

You have ever thrown or attended a chicken pox party.

Your child is on a delayed, selective, or nonexistent vaccination schedule.

The idea of cry-it-out makes you cringe, and the sound of another baby crying in the grocery store makes your nipples tingle.

Your toddler has never had actual "baby food".

If you can answer yes to half or more of these, you, like me, are probably more on the crunchy side than the silky.  If not, that's OK.  We can still be friends.  Just don't be surprised when my toddler asks to nurse after lunch time.  :)

No comments: